The World of Leonard Maltin part 1: What if he picked the Oscar for Best Picture?

Leonard Maltin is one of the most respected film critics in the United States. His Movie Guide, released every August, has been a regular fixture for movie fans for over 20 years. I have owned a copy of his movie guide since the early 1990's. His reviews led me to watch the films of Fellini, Hitchcock, Bergman, Ray (Both Nicholas and Satyajit), Renoir and many more. This does not imply slavish devotion. I disagree with him, in particular, about many films made after 1970. However, our opinions are in perfect harmony regarding roughly 98% of films pre-dating the 1970's. I must clarify, however, that my disagreements are usually about him not giving certain films the praise and accolades they deserve. We are going to conduct an experiment, with Leonard Maltin at the heart of the matter.

The Academy Awards will be telecast this Sunday. The 83rd edition of this venerable old film award has not been without its controversies and politics. Awards are sometimes given for political or personal reasons. As I discussed in my second blog, there is a difference between personally liking something and trying to give an intellectual assessment of quality, justified by scholarly knowledge.

Assuming Leonard Maltin's expertise as a film critic, with over 20,000 entries in his latest guide, I posit the following question: What if Leonard Maltin picked the Academy Award winners? 42 of the 82 current Best Picture winners did not receive a **** rating, Maltin's highest. If this respected film critic decided which film won Best Picture, certainly the automatic pre-requisite for consideration would be a **** review. If he had ten films to choose from and only five of them had **** reviews, he wouldn't pick a ***1/2 or *** film as the Best Picture. Those ratings are given as not only a mark of opinion but also of quality.

Therefore, if a Best Picture Oscar was given to a film without a **** rating, I am changing it to a film with said rating. Of the 40 **** Best Picture Winners, I am invoking a power of veto over five of them which, despite receiving **** ratings, I believe needed to be awarded to other films. Plus I am also invoking a special VETO for the year 1994. For uncontested films, there are brief notes following each one. I will note if enough **** nominees existed for each year for the Academy's nominees. I will then briefly speculate as to how the course of film history could have changed because of my (or Leonard Maltin's) alterations. This blog therefore falls into that category of "If you could change history, would you?" Speaking of history, I am changing the weird way the Academy's first years were numbered, i.e. the first awards are referred to as 1927/1928; the second, 1928/1929, etc. No politics. No "compensation awards" (example: giving Henry Fonda a Best Actor Oscar 40 years after he genuinely deserved it!). No favoritism. Just a great film critic and my tweaking. Let's see how the history of film would look.

1927: Wings **1/2(Official Winner)/ Sunrise****(Altered Winner (given "Outstanding Artistic Achievement, whatever the hell that means!))

Nominations: 3/ Available **** films: 6

Hollywood Changed?: Instead of a puffed up special effects film winning the top prize, a sublimely powerful masterpiece would have convinced studio heads to not always defer to empty spectacle. Artistic, emotional, dramatic films, become the norm. And we don't have to deal with the lunacy of "The Greatest Show On Earth" winning in 1952!

1928: NA (Remember, 1927/1928)/ The Crowd****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: NA/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: King Vidor's masterpiece catapults him from obscurity into Frank Capra-esque or Alfred Hitchcock-esque fame. A great director, he struggled to make a film of this quality ever again.

1929: Broadway Melody**1/2 (Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: Chalk this year up to the transition to sound. Some very good films were released, the year the stock market crashed. Perhaps the lack of a **** film reflected the panic about to grip the world. As a default, but not an official endorsement, I'd pick Alfred Hitchcock's "Blackmail" as the Best Picture of the year.

1930: All Quiet On the Western Front****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Note: Devastating, beautiful, timeless!

1931: Cimarron **1/2(Official Winner)/ City Lights****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Hollywood Changed?: "Rocky" received the Best Picture gong because of the struggle to bring that particular boxer's tale to the big screen. Chaplin had "director's block" for over a year. When it broke, he completed this irresistible comic masterpiece. C'mon show the love!

1932: Grand Hotel****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 8/ Available **** films: 4

Note: Rockin' movie! Turned into an awesome musical!

1933: Cavalcade****(Official Winner)/ Queen Christina****(VETO!)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 12

Hollywood Changed?: "Duck Soup" would have been a great winner, but the loss of Greta Garbo in 1941, to premature retirement, may have been partially due to never winning a Best Actress Oscar. "Queen Christina's" triumph would have led to Garbo's; and the Hays Code would have been on a less secure footing. 1933 was the height of the Pre-Code era in Hollywood and the Best Picture winner should have reflected that!

1934: It Happened One Night****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 12/ Available **** films: 7

Note: Quality choice! No complaints...I do love "The Thin Man", however...

1935: Mutiny On the Bounty****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 12/ Available **** films: 11

Note: A bit weird, as it won nothing else! Still a good movie!

1936: The Great Ziegfeld***1/2(Official Winner)/ Mr. Deeds Goes to Town****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 8

Hollywood Changed?: This is a REALLY tough choice. Flawless comedy "Libeled Lady" or peerless adult dramas "Dodsworth" or "These Three"? And then, there's "Modern Times". Add four more powerhouse films and you have probably the most difficult choice in this experiment. I had to go with "Mr. Deeds" because it is not a comedy or a tragedy: it transcends both. Now that's what I call a Best Picture!

1937: The Life of Emile Zola****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 12

Note: "Lost Horizon" may be exotic, but this is as solid a bio-pic as you'll ever see!

1938: You Can't Take It With You***1/2(Official Winner)/ Bringing Up Baby****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 5

Hollywood Changed?: I know it bombed on first release! I know it needed repeated showings on TV to become popular! And I know Oscar is afraid of looking to the future! "Bringing Up Baby" may possibly be the most brilliant, multi-layered, sophisticated comedy in film history. And how did the Hays' Office miss, "Then why are you wearing these clothes?" "Because I just went GAY all of a sudden!" Priceless!

1939: Gone With the Wind****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 11

Note: In a great year, this over-the-top movie became its poster-child.

1940: Rebecca****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 11

Note: Yes, "The Grapes of Wrath" and "The Philadelphia Story" are better. But it's Hitchcock! He never got a Best Director award! Bite me!

1941: How Green Was My Valley****(Official Winner)/ Citizen Kane****(VETO!)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 6

Note: If you need to ask why this VETO needs to be made, you are not a film fan! The only truly bad potential consequence of Orson Welles' triumph would have been the inevitable retreat by William Randolph Hearst, as he continued to slander the film, and Hollywood. So distracted, he might not have later become the one major US news magnate who covered the holocaust in Europe, as it happened. To his credit, he played it up, while other papers played it down. Who knows what would have happened to this coverage or Hearst's insistence on creating a homeland for displaced Jews after the war had ended. Anyway, on a positive note, it would have shut that bitch Louella Parsons up!

1942: Mrs. Miniver***1/2(Official Winner)/ In Which We Serve****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: 1942 & 1943 are the two goofiest years in Oscar history. The only reason "Mrs. Miniver" did not compete with "Casablanca" is that the latter did not open in both New York City and L.A. by December 31st of the competing year. If it did, "Casablanca" would have won, and "Mrs. Miniver" would not have gathered as much public sympathy, precipitating America's involvement in WWII. Therefore, I picked a **** film about the British Armed Forces, capable of drawing on an audience's sympathy. It's also a bloody good film!

1943: Casablanca****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 10/ Available **** films: 4

Note: A classic...even if Ilsa loses her convictions towards the end. Tragic romance or the screenwriters terrified what the audience would have said if she shot Bogey? You decide. "You'll have to think for both of us". Seemed perfectly capable of thinking for herself!

1944: Going My Way****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 6

Note: This is a mixed blessing. The acting awards were well deserved, but this movie helped bring an end to the "big band" era. A successful musical without a big band orchestra; just Bing and a piano.

1945: The Lost Weekend****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 12

Note: Rarely equaled, never surpassed!

1946: The Best Years of Our Lives****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 13

Note: Everything a best picture winner should be and more!

1947: Gentlemen's Agreement***(Official Winner)/ Bicycle Thieves****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 6

Hollywood Changed?: A watery, unconvincing indictment of anti-semitism in American society? Or, a film made in a war-ravaged fascist hellhole, trying to put itself back together? Oscar had the opportunity to give a golden seal of approval to re-emerging Italy. They blew it and Italy's film industry would spend the next thirty years making films that smoked almost everything coming out of Hollywood.

1948: Hamlet****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: Rewind to senior year high school english: "To be or not to be". Ohhh! I understand now! Thanks Olivier!

1949: All the King's Men****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: Broderick Crawford! Broderick Crawford! Broderick Crawford!

1950: All About Eve****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 5

Note: Whether it is Hollywood raked over the coals ("Sunset Boulevard") or Broadway raked over the coals ("All About Eve"), who cares! They're both great! "Fasten your seat-belts! It's gonna be a bumpy night!" "Sunset Boulevard" winning the toprize would have been undeniably interesting!

1951: An American In Paris***1/2(Official Winner)/ A Streetcar Named Desire****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: Marlon Brando completes the acting sweep for the first and only time in Oscar history. As great as the final ballet in "An American In Paris" is, losing the Best Picture award in this year would clear the way for the following year.

1952: The Greatest Show On Earth***1/2(Official Winner)/ Singin' In the Rain****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 6

Hollywood Changed?: The greatest movie musical of all time! No contest! Period! End of Sentence! Move on! Next year please!

1953: From Here to Eternity****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: Montgomery Clift, Burt Lancaster, Deborah Kerr and Frank Sinatra...holy crap!

1954: On the Waterfront****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: Even though "Rear Window" came out the same year, marvelous choice! "Yo Terry!"

1955: Marty***1/2(Official Winner)/ Rebel Without A Cause****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 8

Hollywood Changed?: "Marty" was ultimately a good choice except for one minor fact. James Dean starred in 2 of the 8 **** films this year. To send a definitive statement to all "the squares", "Rebel" winning would have sent a clear message as to what young people were really upset about: feeling alienated from their parents and the American dream. Sound familiar?

1956: Around the World In 80 Days**1/2(Official Winner)/ The Searchers****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: This year enters the category of "WHAT THE F*** WERE YOU THINKING?" The greatest western ever, with the first sympathetic portrayal of Native Americans, but it has an unsympathetic hero. Therefore, we ignore it! One, two, three: BOOT TO THE HEAD!

1957: The Bridge on the River Kwai****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 10

Note: I REALLY WANT TO USE A VETO! I REALLY WANT TO! But I won't. Rock on Sir Alec!

1958: Gigi****(Official Winner)/ Vertigo****(VETO!)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: "Vertigo" was like an intellectual bullet-train, before bullet-trains existed. With a Best Picture award, people would have gone back to  the theater, re-watched this film and might have reached the same conclusion I reached over 20 years ago: "Vertigo" is the greatest film ever made; and, at the rate we are going, ever will be made.

1959: Ben-Hur***1/2(Official Winner)/ Some Like It Hot****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: I will defer to the AFI on this one. In order for this to work, WE MUST ACCEPT CROSS-DRESSING INTO OUR HEARTS; that, and Marilyn Monroe.

1960: The Apartment****(Official Winner)/ Psycho****(VETO!)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: "Psycho" revolutionized how we attended the movies. It revolutionized what expect from movies. It revolutionized how movies were made. Funny: the same thing was said about James Cameron, just before they gave him Best Picture for "Titanic".

1961: West Side Story****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 8

Note: Only in Amer-I-ca!

1962: Lawrence of Arabia****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 8

Note: I love this film winning, except for Peter O'Toole's snub. Oscar! Are ya' blind? Yes, I love Atticus Finch! But, come on!

1963: Tom Jones****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 8

Note: Good year. Decent year. I could make a case for Fellini or Steve McQueen...but I'm not going to.

1964: My Fair Lady***1/2(Official Winner)/ Dr. Strangelove****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 10

Hollywood Changed?: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb. The entire title is important. So is its message. Don't bring us to the brink of nuclear war again, or we will make a film that makes world leaders look like delusional jackasses; at least, that's how I imagine it!

1965: The Sound of Music***1/2(Official Winner)/ Repulsion****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: This one is just to piss off the Roman Polanski witchhunt crew. He served his time for statutory rape. The judge changed his mind after the sentence had been fulfilled, wanting to make an example of him. The charges are bulls***, if you can read. Giving Best Picture to one of his films would have changed how this whole California miscarriage of justice would have played out.

1966: A Man for All Seasons****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Note: Nice slice of English history!

1967: In the Heat of the Night****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 8

Note: "They call me Mr. Tibbs!" Yes sir, Mr. Tibbs, sir!

1968: Oliver!(Official Winner)/ 2001: A Space Odyssey****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Hollywood Changed?: In a psychedelic decade, there should have been at least one psychedelic film to win Best Picture. The best way to describe Kubrick's masterpiece is a science fiction film on acid. If you tell me being stoned does not feel the same as being weightless, and I will tell you you've never been stoned. Add in the trippy ending, it would have reflected how high Hollywood was at the time. Plus, it would have paved the way for "Star Wars".

1969: Midnight Cowboy****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Note: The only X-Rated movie to win Best Picture...and it isn't even dirty! It is one of the richest, most rewarding films of the 1960's!

1970: Patton****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: George C. Scott and Karl Malden in their finest hour. I love MASH but...DAMN!

1971: The French Connection****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Note: The first full-fledged modern cop movie! Bravo! YES I'VE SEEN "BULLITT", DAMMIT!

1972: The Godfather****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 5

Note: HEY! FUGGEDDABOUTIT!

1973: The Sting***1/2(Official Winner)/ Mean Streets****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 5

Hollywood Changed?: Martin Scorsese gets the award he always deserved. Maybe he doesn't spend his entire career chasing it!

1974: The Godfather II****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 9

Note: HEY! FUGGEDDABOUTIT! part 2.

1975: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 6

Note: Nothing to add. Brilliant! The right choice! Rock on!

1976: Rocky***1/2(Official Winner)/ Network****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Hollywood Changed?: There was a collective "huh?" in Hollywood, when Stallone and co. won. "Network" is the film that for so many reasons should have won. Everyone knew it, except Oscar!

1977: Annie Hall****(Official Winner)/ Star Wars***1/2(VETO!)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Hollywood Changed?: NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! You raised the ratings for "The Godfather" and "A Christmas Story". This movie has had the most influence on Hollywood since "The Jazz Singer"! Wake up Leonard Maltin! It's a **** film! You may love Woody Allen, but "Annie Hall" is damn-near-unwatchable! With the win, George Lucas' grip on Hollywood is lessened, from respectability. There is a chance he directs the sequels, which means he doesn't make the prequels; a blessing on us all!

1978: The Deer Hunter****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Note: Christopher Walken and Robert DeNiro: rarely has so much acting craziness been trapped in one room. My only problem with this film: Coppola the following year!

1979: Kramer vs. Kramer****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Note: I come from a broken home. Therefore, this film is sacrosanct. However, "Apocalypse Now***1/2" should have probably beaten it. Can't give Best Picture to two Vietnam War Movies in succession! People will start to think we didn't like the war! DUH!!!

1980: Ordinary People****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 7

Note: I like this film. "Raging Bull" does create a few problems...so does "Kagemusha"...

1981: Chariots of Fire***1/2(Official Winner)/ Circle of Deceit****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Hollywood Changed?: The Germans are coming! The Germans are coming! And it's about bloody time too!

1982: Gandhi***1/2(Official Winner)/ Tootsie****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 10

Hollywood Changed?: Dustin Hoffman's masterpiece, Sydney Pollack's masterpiece, Jessica Lange's masterpiece, Terri Garr's masterpiece, Bill Murray's masterpiece, Charles Durning's masterpiece, Dabney Coleman's masterpiece...are you getting the picture yet? Also, I suffer from "E.T." burnout. Yes, "Gandhi" was an important man. Plus, Dustin Hoffman is the most convincing transvestite, until Eddie Izzard... or is he just funny...anyway...

1983: Terms of Endearment****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 5

Note: There is not enough kleenex in the world to watch this movie. "A Christmas Story", "El Norte" and "Fanny and Alexander" possibly warrant a VETO!, but I have bigger films to fry(?).

1984: Amadeus**1/2(Official Winner)/ Stop Making Sense****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: The play "Amadeus" is much better than the film. Plus, wouldn't it have been awesome to hear David Byrne's acceptance speech?!!!

1985: Out of Africa***1/2(Official Winner)/ Shoah****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: "Night and Fog" is the short holocaust movie, "Shoah" is the long one, making "Schindler's List" seem a little superfluous...which it is.

1986: Platoon***1/2(Official Winner)/ Laputa: Castle In the Sky****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: Hayao Miyazaki and Studio Ghibli become the vanguard in feature length animated films, at a time when Disney was in the doldrums. "The Little Mermaid" still in development, it would have meant the end of the Mouse! Anime arrives to the US earlier than expected.

1987: The Last Emperor***1/2(Official Winner)/ Moonstruck****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Hollywood Changed?: Cher's dress not-withstanding, this should have been Norman Jewison's triumph. "Babette's Feast" nearly trumps this wonderful New York City character study. But, as my wife pointed out, very few of the cast ever gave such good performances again. They would not have such a wonderful script; and Norman Jewison seemed perfectly at home; perhaps more-so than any film he had ever made. As for "The Untouchables", there were 13 of them, not 4. Some of them got injured, but none of them were ever killed in the line of duty; hence why they are called THE UNTOUCHABLES! And I know Sean Connery's Oscar was long overdue, but his is the WORST Irish accent in film history. Connery is officially inducted into the "Dick Van Dyke club" for that one. Loved DeNiro, loved Costner. The movie should simply have been called something else, as so many of the facts were distorted.

1988: Rain Man***(Official Winner)/ The Unbearable Lightness of Being****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Hollywood Changed?: This change has been made out of shear bloody-mindedness! "Unbearable" is the only film Maltin has demoted from **** to ***1/2, that I have encountered. Lenny: you can raise the ratings, but you can't lower them! Not much in Hollywood changes, because of this film's fictional triumph. Daniel Day Lewis still runs away with Best Actor the following year. Maybe the Oscars would have recognized his Hawkeye from "The Last of the Mohicans", if "Unbearable" had won the big prize.

1989: Driving Miss Daisy***(Official Winner)/ Glory****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: Greatest War movie ever made, featuring African-Americans with empowerment vs. black servitude during the 50's. You decide.

1990: Dances With Wolves****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Note: The coolest part about this film: Watching this movie in a theater, the floor rumbling during the buffalo stampede. "Dick Tracy" winning would have been interesting; but all in all, a good choice. It's a pity Kevin Costner only has one directing project in him!

1991: The Silence of the Lambs***1/2(Official Winner)/ Raise the Red Lantern****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: "Raise the Red Lantern" was the best film made in the entire decade of the 90's. Don't believe me? Watch it! And for God's sake, read the sub-titles! Dubbing into English is the Devil's work!

1992: Unforgiven***(Official Winner)/ Howard's End****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: I love "Unforgiven". But "Howard's End is weird and ambiguous, especially for an Edwardian bodice-ripper...which doesn't rip much, except morals and ethics.

1993: Schindler's List****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Note: "Night and Fog" that lasts 3 hours? The film really gets moving in the last forty minutes. The rest is a thinly disguised, self-indulgent mess-of-a-portrayal of Spielberg's life as a director. Ralph Fiennes is good, though.

1994: Forrest Gump**1/2(Official Winner)/ Little Women****(Altered Winner)/ Pulp Fiction***1/2(VETO!)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: Big ol' freakin' veto! Yes "Little Women" should out-and-out win. I don't care! This is a VETO I can't ignore! "Pulp Fiction" always has and always will be the Best Picture of 1994. DEAL WITH IT!

1995: Braveheart***1/2(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: This is ridiculous! Collectively the best year in film since 1982 and not a single film (Braveheart, iL Postino, Se7ven, The Usual Suspects, Persuasion, Babe) got ****?!!! I'm out of VETOES! And, because a **** film is not involved, I technically can't use one. SCREW-IT!! I hereby give the film Persuasion ****, because it is the entire book beautifully condensed into 105 minutes. Flawless acting, directing and writing. Best Picture winner! Suck it Lenny!

1996: The English Patient***1/2(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: "Fargo" is only worth ***1/2? In older editions, Leonard Maltin's guide contained a "100 must-see movies" list, which contained "Casablanca", "Dr. Strangelove" and "Fargo"! I will leave that thought with you all...

1997: Titanic**1/2(Official Winner)/ 4 Little Girls****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: It is my pleasure and privilege to say to all of you who love DiCaprio and Winslet's schmaltz fest, WATCH "A NIGHT TO REMEMBER" AND GET ON WITH YOUR LIVES!!! "Malcolm X" should have copped the lot. "4 Little Girls" would have made up for that.

1998: Shakespeare In Love***1/2(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: This year looked to be a showdown between two war movies. Because Terrence Malick has NEVER received the accolades he deserved ("Days of Heaven"- hello?!!), I am unofficially giving this year to "The Thin Red Line". If you're curious why I did not choose that OTHER war film, skip to 2009 and find out.

1999: American Beauty***1/2(Official Winner)/ Cider House Rules****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: Tobey Maguire is in a Best Picture winner and maybe doesn't do the Spider-Man movies; which would be a bad thing, except for the hugely disappointing third film.

2000: Gladiator***(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: What the hell? Really? Nothing? I'm giving this one to "Shadow of the Vampire" just to be kinky. Also, no one today outside of a film classroom knows who in the hell F.W. Murnau is; and that should be a crime against society!

2001: A Beautiful Mind***(Official Winner)/ Songcatcher****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: Celebrating American folk music or a soft gloved portrayal of a half-cracked mathematician? American music has always trumped math, for me.

2002: Chicago***(Official Winner)/ The Fast Runner****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: Come on people: the Inuit tribe is not exactly known for their prolific cinematic output. This film is in some ways a corrective to "Nanook of the North", which did not exactly need correcting in the first place. This is when achievement should have trumped glamour.

2003: The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King***1/2(Official Winner)/ The Barbarian Invasions****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Hollywood Changed?: This is an unfortunate casualty of this experiment. Because the Oscars and Leonard Maltin cannot acknowledge "Star Wars'" greatness, this last film version of Tolkien's trilogy is the only fantasy film to win the big prize. But the conditions of the experiment means that Lucas wins by altering history and Jackson doesn't. And for that, nobody wins.

2004: Million Dollar Baby***(Official Winner)/ Motorcycle Diaries****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 4

Hollywood Changed?: "Motorcycle Diaries": Best Adapted Screenplay and Best Song? Really people?! Really?!!! Are you off your tree or something?!!!! Sheesh!

2005: Crash***1/2(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: Probably should have been "Brokeback Mountain", but the conservative element in Hollywood wouldn't stand for it...did you just laugh as loudly as I did?!

2006: The Departed***1/2(Official Winner)/ Little Children****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 1

Hollywood Changed?: Kate Winslet gets her Oscar ahead of schedule. We can all get on with our lives. Don't believe me? "Little Children" was the only **** of 2006 and didn't get a single nomination...in anything!

2007: No Country For Old Men***1/2(Official Winner)/ No End in Sight****(Altered Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 2

Hollywood Changed?: A rarity, even for this experiment: a documentary winning Best Picture. If it had won, it would have been a bold statement from the entertainment capital of the world: this can never happen again; and if it does, we will smoke you!

2008: Slumdog Millionaire****(Official Winner)

Nominations: 5/ Available **** films: 3

Note: Saw this one coming a million miles away, which seems appropriate.

2009: The Hurt Locker***1/2(Official Winner)/ VOID(Altered Winner)

Nominations:10/ Available **** films: 0

Hollywood Changed?: Maybe "District 9" should have won. However, I need to thank Kathryn Bigelow and her extraordinary film. After the opening antics of "Saving Private Ryan", I doubted whether I could ever watch another war movie ever again; not because it was impressive, but because no film has ever made me feel so physically ill. Spielberg figuratively shot himself in the foot with that film, in my opinion. I felt so disgusted after the first 15 minutes, I have refused to watch the rest of the film ever since. Ms. Bigelow's film conveyed the full horrors of bomb disposal, without resorting to every cheap, visceral, cinematic trick in the book. Spielberg's film resembles a horror film, which is not what I paid to see. Ms. Bigelow gave me my money's worth. I don't want a film to ever fully convey the horrors of war. As soon as a film can do that, we have trivialized the true horrors of war into a piece of entertainment. Thank you Ms. Bigelow and shame on you Spielberg!

So, there you have it: what would the Oscars and film history have looked like if Leonard Maltin chose the winners. Some very positive changes would have been made. "Citizen Kane" would have made a mockery of William Randolph Hearst, but it might have proved to be too distracting from the important work of reporting on the holocaust and the creation of Israel. "Laputa" would have legitimized Japanese animation a decade sooner. "Vertigo" would not have needed to wait twenty years for the critical acclaim it deserved, and Hitchcock might not have pulled it and four of his greatest films from circulation, in disgust with his audience for not understanding him. John Wayne could have won his Oscar for his Best performance and favorite character he ever played. Plus it would have given the Civil Rights movement an early boost. Who knows how much violence would have been created or avoided by that.

Unfortunately, changing history in the manner of this experiment does not fix all of the injustices committed by Oscar. 1939, 1940, 1941 and 1946 are so congested with masterpieces, it is impossible to give them all Best Picture awards. The rise of the Hays code and unofficial censorship was inevitable, and changing the 1933 Best Picture winner would have delayed their influence, but not stopped it. Women's roles would have dried up, as they did after the code came into full effect, and Garbo would have probably prematurely retired anyway. "The Lord of the Rings" films would not have received the official recognition they deserved, "The Day the Earth Stood Still" would still have the misfortune of competing against Marlon Brando and "Forbidden Planet" would still duke it out with The Duke! Therefore, what does this experiment tells us about the Oscars? Hollywood is a very complex world, full of politics, favoritism and commerce. Thankfully, with all of these threats to creativity, at least 45% of the time, they pick a really good film for the Best Picture of the year. Let's hope they do a good job this year.